Bigfoot Awareness, Resistance and Education (B.A.R.E.)

According to the Missing 411 series, thousands of people have gone missing in America’s National Parks, all under a set of very similar circumstances. These similar circumstances are so obvious it is hard to ignore: they all occur near trees, rocks and water! And they all occur outside, when there is weather. This is not simply a case of people going lost in the wilderness, according to David Paulides, the brave and logical former police officer who is behind Missing 411. There is clearly something more sinister at work.

After being removed from the police force for committing fraud, Paulides has done so much to help the families of these missing victims. Despite never solving a single case, he has courageously produced 10 films and honorably raised over $150,000 on kickstarter to fund more films. While others sit idly by and ignore this problem, Paulides is heroically making YouTube videos—while scowling into the camera, belching, and complaining about the massive conspiracy by big tech that’s causing him to lose viewers. 

While Paulides never says it directly in his videos, it’s clear what is causing these people to go missing in the wilderness of our National Parks. There is no possible way they are succumbing to the elements, getting lost, or becoming the prey of known species like grizzlies or mountain lions. No way. There is only one logical explanation: Bigfoot. 

Yes, Bigfoot is clearly snatching all of these folks from the National Parks. And that is why the government refuses to investigate. The government doesn’t want the truth coming out. But Paulides does, and his past history of defrauding celebrities while working as an officer of the law is not standing in his way.

Today we at 603 Bigfoot are also acknowledging the problem with the launch of the Bigfoot Awareness, Resistance and Education Program—or B.A.R.E. for short. 

The B.A.R.E. program is designed to give youngsters and others the tools and knowledge they need to stay out of the hands of aggressive Bigfoot. The fundamental principles are:

B – for Bigfoot (obviously)

A – Awareness. How to be aware of your surroundings and know when Bigfoot are lurking nearby—keeping your head on a swivel, in other words.

R – Resistance. Self defense tips specialized for fending off Bigfoot attacks, learned from the only scientist to have successfully fought off Bigfoot. 

E – Education. Knowledge of Bigfoot tendencies, habits and side-effects so you can avoid putting yourself into Bigfoot territory in the first place. 

These tools will help prevent more people from becoming subjects of Missing 411 episodes. Eventually, perhaps Paulides can retire from making videos and future generations will not be subjected to watching that nonsense.

This curriculum can be adapted to many different forums, including (but not limited to): elementary schools, graduate courses, historical society meetings, bachelor/bachelorette parties and law enforcement training. Please contact us at www.603bigfoot.com if you are interested in learning more.

Together, we can B.A.R.E. the Truth About Bigfoot™.